Reply to Are People Without Kids Treated Unfairly By Those With Kids?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Yes, I do think that people can take childless single women for granted!  I have a kick-ass childless friend who recently got tenure and bought a house.  I sent her a housewarming gift.  She replied effusively -- because NOBODY had sent her a housewarming gift or even really acknowledged the milestones!  I thought that was really crappy.  [/quote]

I have kids. Nobody sent me housewarming gifts and I admit I don’t send them out either. Nobody sent my DH gifts when he got tenure. Many people sent us gifts and congratulations after our children were born.

Maybe it doesn’t have anything to do with being childless, maybe these milestones just aren’t acknowledged in your circle? [/quote]

NP -- I don't think it's about THOSE milestones. Maybe buying a house isn't a big deal in your crowd. Or maybe tenure isn't a big deal because no one in your crowd thinks of academia. But I think the point is single childless people tend to get NO celebrations. So no wedding showers; wedding; baby showers; no one calling in their congrats after babies come etc. and then when you also don't mark their other milestones be it a house or a new job or whatever -- then it's like they get no celebration. I honestly only came to this realization recently. A single childless friend in her 40s was going on for a while about how she got a minor award at lunch and they threw her a lunch (in the office, not a blacktie reception) -- and the food they ordered and how they know she likes x -- and I found myself thinking -- WTH it's an OFFICE lunch, what's the big deal. And then it occurred to me everyone wants to be celebrated and when you get to a certain age and don't have kids very few people are doing anything for you/asking about you etc. It's true for parents too -- not that many people are doing anything for YOU, but still people ask about your family and your own kids will at least mark your birthdays or anniversaries or whatever depending on family culture.[/quote]

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