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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP- he is refusing to get treatment for his depression and using drugs to cope, including allowing drugs around our infant. I don't really know how else to get through to him. FWIW we are UMC, he is a big law partner. I don't think anyone would suspect so it's hard carrying this secret. [/quote]

Crap - that's bad - are you in individual therapy? If not, you need it STAT - probably no time for al-anon, but would be good for you too. I'd also go straight to my parents house with the baby if you have that support system in place.  Your priority has to be safety of the baby - [/quote]

+1 to all of this. I know if this was me I would desperately want to keep this a secret, but that might not be the right thing to do. Talk to a counselor.

And I d probably be headed to my parents house in this situation.

I will say this - it’s one thing if he wants to get better, even if it’s in a month or two. If not, then initiate separation. My situation is nowhere near comparable, but I know the exact moment when I wish I had left some 10 years ago. I kept telling myself it was ok, not that bad, etc. We got it together enough to have a second kid, but the last few years have been really, really rough. But now we’d be breaking up a mature family unit instead of a toddler not really remembering their parents living together.

Reading something like this also might help you: https://www.nytimes.com/2017/07/15/business/lawyers-addiction-mental-health.html[/quote]

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