Reply to Guilt over having an only child

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[quote=Anonymous]I’m an only child and desperately wanted a sibling when I was young but it wasn’t going to happen. My parents were older (my mom was 40 and dad almost 60) and they never planned to have more than one. The BEST thing my mom did was frequently tell me that she only ever wanted one child and she was so glad she had me and I was enough.

I’m 36 and super fortunate my parents are still alive and I’m reasonably good health. I married young and have 3 kids and in some ways know I had kids earlier as a deliberate choice to allow my kids to know their grandparents. I also got lucky and met dh when I was in my early 20s, and he also had older parents and was even more in favor of having kids than I was! I do look forward to family events when our kids are grown and have their own families (if they so choose), and yes, holidays with just my parents and me (and one grandparent) were a little quiet, but that was my normal. I didn’t even have any cousins around my age, so I was really the only kid around ever. I think that also made me feel more ready for “adulting” at a younger age than many of my friends.

My parents did let me bring friends along on some family trips, and I think because it wasn’t horribly expensive we traveled a lot and I had some wonderful experiences growing up that we probably couldn’t have afforded if I’d had siblings. As a parent if multiple kids now I sometimes find myself wondering what our lives would be like if we had stopped after one.

Op, please continue to love your son and be grateful for him, and let him know you are content with your family the way it is. [/quote]

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