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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think there is a difference between “abuse” and “being cruel/crude/whatever.” Abuse indicates a pattern of controlling behavior. People can say mean things without rising to the level of “being abusive.”

Unless we are classifying every time one partner loses their temper, raises their voice or uses profanity as being abusers which I think minimizes more egregious behavior.[/quote]

+1. My husband called me a "bitch" once in nearly 8 years of marriage. He is usually very kind, calm, considerate, patient and measured. I'm not going to look at that one moment in 10+ years of being together as "abusive." He was in a sleep-deprived, baby-and-a-toddler state, and I'm not going to pretend like he's was "abusive" in that moment.

Was that OK? No. Were there extenuating circumstances? Yes. [/quote]

It was still verbally abusive. Why call it something else?[/quote]

OK, so if your usually-good-as-gold 18-year-old high school senior called someone a "bitch" at school during a verbal argument, he should be expelled? After all, abusive people shouldn't be allowed in a school environment. [/quote]

No they should cut out his tongue. WTF do you have to go to the extreme to try to prove a point it just makes you sound ignorant.

Yes, it is abusive and it should be corrected in some way with some sort of punishment. Maybe an apology and some anger management discussion with the teacher.

We should not just say... hey that is not abusive because we don't want to expel him. It was abusive and let's correct it.

BTW, at my kids school there would be punishment for calling somebody a "bitch" also 1 love foundation talks to kids every year to discuss abusive relationships. [/quote]

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