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Eldercare
Reply to "If you were stay at home mom or working mom what are your regrets?"
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[quote=Anonymous]Strong, strong regrets. After our second, I quit working and basically told DH I couldn't be a good mother and worker and wife and something had to give. In hindsight, I was probably being a bit dramatic and did not deal with my own issues (perfectionism and never being good enough), but I basically put it down as an ultimatum. DH was a good parent, more naturally suited with small children than me but basically agreed because the alternative was getting divorced. I was a good SAHP. I really leaned into things and enjoyed the kids, particularly as they got older. But my marriage went to garbage. DH left when our youngest was finished with undergrad. It was a shock but in hindsight, I could see that he was basically biding his time, raising his kids and was checked out. We both failed in terms of getting our marriage on track after that rough patch but we were functional enough that it didn't phase me and DH did not seem to care (probably a red flag in hindsight). I am two years divorced and it's hard. I am trying to get back into working but I am 53. I got a decent settlement and we sold our home and we're in different places but he is doing way way better than me.[/quote]
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