Reply to If you were a mean middle schooler way back when...why?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I was usually nice enough, but I definitely had mean moments. I wasn’t a bully. I didn’t target anyone repeatedly, but I took practical jokes too far.

I was abused and raised in that kind of environment. I wasn’t taught empathy. I was made fun of if I cried. My parents and aunts and uncles were all douchebag bullies who thought nothing of picking on kids to toughen them up. My grandparents really did a number on that generation, who in turn raised us to be jerks. I thought everyone acted that way, because all the authority figures in my family did.

When I was old enough to think beyond my own feelings I realized I didn’t want to be that way so I changed. As I grew up and became more independent I was able to change into who I wanted to be more, but it wasn’t until I went away to college that I realized the toxic environment I grew up in. I moved far away after college and raised my children to respect others’ feelings and break the cycle.

I’ve done therapy but I really feel like my formative years have done permanent damage to me. Kindness isn’t my first instinct. I have to stop and think, and actively choose to be kind and gracious sometimes. I envy people who had a normal upbringing with kind parents who value and respect other people’s feelings. [/quote]

I really admire you for choosing to be kind, and for breaking your parents’ cycle without a model for kindness. [/quote]

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