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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, if you want something take it now, not when your mom is gone (assuming your mom is near death).  My good friend had a situation where her sister claimed to "take care of" their mom.  The mom sold her condo, left her hometown friends and moved in with the sister (the mom had bought the sister a house in another state).

Over the years, the sister took everything - the family money  (purposefully set up a bunch of CDs, so the mom could not touch that money without penalty, so the mom left it); plus she charged the mom rent (for living in the house that the mom bought!  Who does that?); plus the sister then opened a life insurance policy that the mother paid for; plus a bunch of gold jewelry that the mom acquired over the years (the mom did not believe in costume jewelry); plus every single family photograph.

This seems like your sister.  Greedy.  Nothing more, nothing less. Greedy people stop at nothing.  In my friend's case, she stopped talking to the sister when the mom died, because they were never that close, and the sister stealing everything just made it worse.  My friend has children that were close to their grandmother, but the sister has no kids, and the sister would rather literally throw the jewelry away than let my friend have one piece for her children.

That is the kind of person you are dealing with.  The only person your sister cares about is herself, that will not change.  Take what you want now, otherwise you will get nothing one the sister steps in.  People like your sister have issues, and trying to control other people is one way their issues come out, because they have so little control in their own life. Sad but true.

Let me guess, your sister is jealous of you, right?  I am guessing yes, and that fuels her selfishness even more.    [/quote]

OP here. This is a pretty good description of my sister.[/quote]

PP here.  I thought so.  In my friend's case, the sister was always the favorite, but that led the sister to be a total slacker, because she could "do no wrong".  Then, when the mother moved in with the sister - the mother discovered that the sister was/is a total slacker (and functioning alcoholic, to boot), with a very, very different persona outside of the house.  The mother was horrified, but it was too late.  When the mother called the sister on the sister's awful behaviors, the sister would scream at the mother and take her phone away, all sorts of awful stuff.  Appearances were/are all that mattered to the sister.  I remember my friend flying the mother to (my friend's) house for vacations and holidays, just to get away from the awful sister. The sister and her husband would leave the mother alone for the holidays!

The mother wasn't always perfect, but no way did she deserve what my friend's sister was doing to her, like the sister had/has no conscience at all.  My friend never forgave  her sister, and I can't really blame her.  The sister's selfishness, self centeredness, compulsive lying, storytelling (to make herself look like the hero, of course!), spending, and greed only got worse over the years, especially when the family found out what was really going on.  That was the sister's worst nightmare, for people to find out the truth.  My friend gave up on any relationship with the sister after the mother died, because really, what was the point - the sister's behaviors were consistently outrageous, and the sister's jealousy was blatant and glaring.  My friend has been successful on her own, and that really bothered the sister, to this day.

Having seen my friend go through this, I would take what you want now, because there is no getting it later.  Like your sister, my friend's sister put everything in her name (the mom was afraid of her). The sister knew how to get everything she wanted, she had years of practice - but brown nosing doesn't really work when you are an adult, so people like that resort to unspeakable tactics - lying, stealing, whatever they have to do, in their mind, to get by.  I am sorry you are going through this.  It is very difficult to see your parents slip away, and have the fox guarding the henhouse - because that is exactly what is happening. Awful, especially for your mom. [/quote]

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