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[quote=Anonymous]There is only one thing that has results you can count on -- and that's neglect.
Anything else, all you can do it try -- you can love your kids 100%, and they can still struggle.  You can do everything the books tell you, and they can still struggle.  You can set a good example, take them to church, get them involved in volunteer work, and they can still struggle.  You just gotta keep trying, because you never know what's going to work.  Hang in there. 
[/quote]

NP here.  I love this.  True, neglect would have terrible consequences and that's something  you could count on.  Anything else is just the best you can think of to do at the moment.  Keep parenting because your stability in the midst of her chaos is like a lighthouse.  It's something to count on, even if seen from a distance.

And please make it your job to do anything which constitutes self care for you.  Something each day.  My kid was in a similar crisis last year at Christmas.  I feel what you are going through.  And I was a teenage runaway who stayed gone and incommunicado for months, who is now a middle aged soccer mom with a great relationship with both parents.

Don't worry if you can't see how life can ever feel ok again.  Just keep taking care of yourself, keep parenting, and know that things can truly get much better.

My love and prayers are with you.[/quote]

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