Reply to Concern over person’s anger at petty stuff even if legit reason to be angry in life generally?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Why isn’t MIL PAYING To have her home winterized? It sounds like it was a much bigger job then taking down some screens. If she can not take care of her house, she needs to move to a condo or apartment where EVERY male in the family is not REQUIRED to give up their Saturday to help her. [/quote]

She is in a tough place financially right now as a result of a job loss. At 55, it is hard to find full time work. She’s working two PT retail positions. Even the Taskrabbit quotes for the work yesterday were going to be a stretch. The house is paid off and she’s lived there her whole life in a safe and supportive neighborhood. She could reasonably age in place there for twenty years and leave the house to her daughter.

No one was required to help out. “Ben” could have refused at the outset. Instead, he said yes, accomplished basically nothing, threw a teenaged tantrum, and left early. DH and the other men finished easily and had a nice beer afterwards. It could have been a good bonding experience for “Ben” who seems to feel like an outsider still after almost two years. Based on a PP, I think that maybe “Ben” doesn’t know how to do some household repairs like caulking and was embarrassed. Like a teen, he thought it saved face to call these tasks stupid rather than ask for or accept help. I think life is hard enough without closing off yourself to help or learning from others. [/quote]

What is wrong with MIL that she can't caulk her own windows or at least work beside the menfolk and learn how to do it?  Seriously, I thought you were talking about an old woman.  55 is middle aged![/quote]

She has helped with repairs. Caulking was a tiny bit of what was needed. A lot of it required two sets of hands or brute strength she doesn’t have. She also works all day on Saturday going from job A to job B. With the temperature drop, her nephew thought it was better to assemble a small crew to get it all done in 3-4 hours than work on it bit by bit over the next couple months.

I’m really shocked at how many people feel it is wrong to ask a 23 year old future family member to help out on a Saturday morning. I was raised very differently I guess. However, I see lots of families and even friends getting together so that many hands make light work. I guess having lots of money makes it possible to just hire someone when you need it, but how do you worry only about yourself? Is everyone you know wealthy?[/quote]

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