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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Hi:[b] I grew up pretty conservatively and sheltered. Started dating in college.[/b]  Also, I am from an ethnic minority where dating frowned upon this young.  My son asked a girl to homecoming.  I prefer that he just goes with a group.  My DH believes that if we forbid him to do these things, he will do them anyway, but behind our backs.  I really think he is too young for all of this and would prefer he focus on school and he can date in college.  He is a responsible kid.  I know this is my issue, but I cannot seem to cope with it or convince myselk that this is ok?  Part of the reason I know is that he is pretty closed off at home and with his sister, so it is hurtful for me to see him forging relationships with a girl when he can't at home....help...[/quote]

While you may have, your son and his peers are not growing up that way.  When you impose such unique constraints on your child, you are going to isolate him from his peers and friends.  They do not have such restrictions and by forcing him to adhere to such constraints it makes him different.  Teenagers can be quite cruel to those who are different and cannot participate in many of the general activities that peers do together.

If you know that he is a responsible kid, talk to him about your expectations for dating, how you expect him to behave, what you expect him to do and what time you expect him home, how and when to contact you.  Then you have to trust him to follow your instructions because you know that he is a responsible kid.  Going to the prom is not the same as dating.  Going to the prom is a one time event.  Dating is a recurring event.

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