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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My dc is quirky and a little dorky and never gets invited or included by kids at school despite hosting endless playdates and parties. I’ve always wondered though, do the parents of the popular kids ever have to suffer?  They seem to reap benefit after benefit. Endless invitations, sycophants kissing up to get in their inner circles, preferential treatment at the school and sports, the list goes on.  Honest question- what are their grievances?

[/quote]

I teach middle school. I recently heard the British expression "punching above your weight" as in "wow mate, that girl you are dating is good looking, you are definelty punching above your weight" (meaning you are in a romantic relationship with someone far more attractive).

OP there is nothing wrong with your kid being quirky or dorky. There are "quirky, dorky, nerdy, awkward"  amazing kids who find each other and hang out both in and outside of school -think Stranger Things group of friends. They can be witty and loyal and busy at play dates and parties. It sounds like you want your kid to be punching above his or her weight and are encouraging your child to hang out with the popular kids. Your child needs to find his or her tribe and own it.  Who comes to these parties you are hosting? Are you inviting other "quirky and a little dorky" kids?

Parents like you sometimes contract the school counselor to help your child be friends with a group of popular kids when they are on the periphery or completely outside the group and are offended when the counselor suggests hanging out with kids the parent doesn't deem socially acceptable. [/quote]

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