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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think it probably doesn’t matter, as a practical matter, if she has ASD or not. So I would wait to reassess until she’s a little older. You may never get a definitive answer or unanimous agreement. But some of the things you mention as counter-evidence, like being social and affectionate, are common in children with ASD, so you also may have a skewed sense of what the current diagnostic criteria are. [/quote]

Of course a correct diagnosis matters.  Nobody has unlimited time and money for therapies; so OP needs to focus on what is actually needed, which is informed by the diagnosis.  Also, kids with ASD are not "social and affectionate' in the same way NT kids are.  Social deficits are core ASD deficits.  You can't get an ASD diagnosis without serious impairment in that area.  So, if OP is observing that her child has similar social skills as her twin, then that's pretty important evidence to consider.  [/quote]

I’m not sure it does. Therapies are determined by the child’s needS. [b]I have a kid with ASD and he is socially motivated and cuddly (or was—he’s a teen now). Deficits in pragmatics aren’t the same thing as not being social or wanting to connect.[/b] I find that people unfamiliar with ASD often expect ASD kids to be asocial and cold, but that isn’t what I see in my son or his friends, and I think OP’s description of her dad reflects an inaccurate perception of ASD.[/quote]

And yes, ASD looks nothing like what I thought before we had our kid.

Oh her *dd*. I didn’t read it that she was saying her dad had the same level of social skills as the twin, only that she shows social motivation and makes some eye contact. Neither of these are inconsistent with ASD.[/quote][/quote]
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Same with my kid. Very social and affectionate but poor pragmatic skills. Like OP, my kid was also a preemie. A followup assessment at 18 months found advanced cognitive and behavioral skills. Poor social pragmatic skills weren't apparent until about age 4.5.

And yes, ASD looks nothing like what I thought before we had our kid.[/quote]

I'm sure you subjectively perceive your child as social and affectionate, but *differences* in social skills is a core aspect of ASD.  That isn't to say that kids with ASD are feelingless automatons.  They just have visible differences in how they interact socially.  If OP is not seeing those differences, that's very important.  [/quote]
Yes, there are differences in social skills.  But the issue of not being "social and affectionate"  is just a false stereotype  and a red herring that you are perpetrating.  Stop it.[/quote]

Kids with ASD just don't socialize and respond to others the same way NT kids do. This is a basic fact. It's not false - it's the defining feature of autism![/quote]

This is the problem with terming everything now ASD.  ASD will look different for each kid as will a language disorder.  ASD and receptive language issues look very similar when kids are little.  It only teases out more when they are older and the speech comes in.[/quote]

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