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Reply to "MIL gossiped about me with my little sister"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You should set some healthy boundaries for yourself. You know there are behavioral and substance abuse issues in play, that she is not kind to you. So just stop hanging out with them - leave them alone entirely. Your husband can go hang; you are under no obligation to do that. You are intentionally setting yourself up for this sort of nonsense. Your husband is not responsible for his parent’s dysfunction, he told you about them, warned you - you know what it was when you married him. Stop putting him in the middle, stop interacting with or about them. This doesn’t need to be complicated, you just have to decide/learn that you establish boundaries with hurtful people and you stay on your side of the line and leave them alone on their side. [/quote] That's all fine and well until they have kids. OPs DH has every intention of allowing any kids around these toxic people. All you're suggesting is that she put her head in the sand until then. Terrible advice.[/quote] OP, will you raise the kids interfaith, or muslim? You and your DH absolutely have every right to raise them as you both decide. The latter is required under Muslim law when the husband is not Muslim (and also when he is, of course). Your DH may also have been asked to convert. It’s possible you’ve “won” and your whackadoodle MIL doesn’t seem like the type to be gracious about it. While you and your DH have the complete right to make your own decisions, these scenarios are absolutely going to be an ongoing source of stress around every major religious holiday, when it’s time to choose schools, and so on. That is, these problems are probably not going to go away. This is something you need to air with your DH (and when talking about it on online fora with us) NOW, before you have children. Your MIL does sound awful. But these are some big issues that in all likelihood will be with you for years, and that no amount of sympathy from DCUM about her being a sloppy drunk will solve. You and DH need to be completely on the same page, whatever that is.[/quote]
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