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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You were emotionally and physically controlled. That is abuse. As far as rating it, that depends on your interpretation of it. Are you angry you lived that way? Are you able to have normal relationships with friends or significant others? This is all for you to decide. My personal judgement is 9.9.[/quote]

My interpretation of it varies depending on the day you ask me. I’ve been thinking about it more because I recently lost one of my parents and I am trying to reconcile all these complicated feelings.  I want to believe they were/are truly good people who just made bad choices and didn’t have a lot of tools and strategies. Because after all, they are my flesh and blood, my parents. Other days, I feel a lot of sadness for the loving childhood I never had. And sometimes I feel anger.  So honestly, I waver— from loving my parents, despite everything and thinking they did what they thought was best for us, to feeling angry toward them for how they were. And at this point in my life, I feel like I just want to leave the past in the past rather than dig through all that old pain. I want to move forward.[/quote]

OP, you can believe your parents did the best they could, and still believe that their best was really really bad.  I think all of the feelings you’re having are normal and sorting out conflicting feelings is one of the main purposes of therapy.  [/quote]

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