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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This is what my parents do - say they are dying to go on a family vacation and then pick something that interests them and is often inconvenient for others, then expect us to pay (although they certainly have the money to treat us all).

In your situation, I told my parents we would love to join but are already planning a trip to London to visit friends (which was true) so unfortunately it’s not in our budget for next year. That gave them a clear opportunity to offer to pay, but they didn’t so we didn’t go.

You should try the same. Just tell them you’ve already planned/committed to something else and give them the hint.[/quote]

Are you not embarassed to accept money from your parents or inlaws now that you are an adult? I would be. In my culture we pay for our parents and inlaws once they get older, even if we are not as wealthy as them. Just a sign of respect for our parents they have done for us.
[/quote]

No. I am not. I'm the one whose dad earns 10 times what I do.  I am not embarrassed at all.  What would upset my father is if he saw me less, or didn't pay for important things like braces because I spent the money on visiting him when he could afford both easily.  It would embarrass him terribly to see me make a choice like that.

Respect among our group is working together as a family so that we all have what we need and we all get to be together.  (In other words better to see me on his doorstep than to know that my absence is a sign of respect.")

You don't have to do it our way, but your blanket statements are naive and offensive.[/quote]

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