Reply to Husband overseas/deployed- my role with inlaws?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OMG.  They are not mind readers.

Pick up the phone and invite them over.  They are probably hesitant to call you because 1. you're busy and 2. you seem pretty cold to them.

Bonus is it's a couple of extra sets of hands to help you.[/quote]

Betcha anything they're sitting there saying "Why doesn't she call and invite us? I guess she doesn't need us or have any interest in letting us see our grandchildren."[/quote]

OP here. Yes. This is what's happening. That's what they told my SIL. [/quote]

OP, what is it that you want? If you don't care if you see the ILs and and don't want/need family help and don't desire to do anything to facilitate interaction with them, then continue to do nothing. But if you do that, you can't then pretend to care what they think about it.

If you want some actual help from the ILs occasionally, then CALL THEM. It sounds like you think they are capable of being helpful (e.g., while you are at a wedding). If that's true, and you'd like their help, CALL THEM AND ASK. Or are you under the impression that your MIL is a mind-reader and therefore knows all on her own when you've got a wedding to attend or a death to process?

The worst, most annoying possible option (for everyone, including those of us on DCUM) is for you to continue to do nothing while also complaining here about the fact that they are complaining. [/quote]

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