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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I could have written OP's post almost verbatim about 9 YO DD.

As far as I can tell, the issue is that she's introverted and a bit awkward socially and therefore has trouble making "deep" connections with other kids.  Easy to get along with, but doesn't form bonds easily.

We try to address this by:

*  Proactively setting up activity-based play dates (going to do "x").  She does better with these than with "what do we do now?" play.

*  Getting her involved in extracurriculars that she really likes--similar interests seem to help bridge the gap.

*  Keeping in close contact with friends outside of school--family friends's kids, kids from prior neighborhood, etc.  Gives her confidence and a feeling of security.

Not sure whether this is the "right" approach (if there is such a thing), but it seems to help her feel engaged and also get the social experience.[/quote]

+1  I think this is spot on.  I, too, suspect that the parents are asking their kids for a handful of their best friends and inviting those kids, and if your kid is friendly but not super "memorable" because he isn't forming super "deep" relationships, then it makes sense that he might not make the cut sometimes.  I wouldn't stress about it too much -- it's probably not a big deal.  Does he have one or two very close friends?  If so, I would foster those friendships and try to ensure that he feels a close bond with at least one other kid.[/quote]

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