Reply to Siblings who refuse to hire childcare

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This might be an inlaw thing/children of my son thing. We too have had 2 hospitalizations where my parents hopped on a plane to help us. My local inlaws did not because it was me who needed help and not my DH (DH is overseas). They think that my parents should help my family when I need help and they should help if DH ever needed help. DH has never needed help though as he's always gone. [/quote]

What?  I have two sons and I hope I am never this crazy when they are adults.[/quote]

Do you have a daughter too? Parents with both a son and a daughter always favor the daughter's kids. Parents with two sons seem to not favor the same way and are more equal. Just something my friends and I have noticed.[/quote]

This is so true. [/quote]

Not in my case.  My mother will move heaven and earth to help with my brother's kids because she is so desperate to please my SIL, who treats her horribly.  She has no problem asking my mother to change her schedule around to accommodate her childcare needs bu[b]t doesn't ever make an effort to spend time with my parents as a family. [/b] Yet she is always making plans with HER parents that don't involve them having to be babysitters.  It's ridiculous!  [/quote]

The same might be said about me as a DIL. I wonder how does she treat them horribly? Maybe she just doesn't like your parents but wants them to have a relationship with their kids. My MIL has really offended me on too many occasions and as a result I have backed off having my own relationship with her, 1:1, as it's clear it was never going to be healthy for me. At the same time I think my children (and she) deserve a bond and so babysitting is the only time they can hang out together and I don't have to be there. I also make plans with my parents that don't involve them being babysitters because I enjoy spending time with my parents.

Also, why is it always the woman who is the bad one? Is it really your SIL or is it your SIL/BIL and you just assume it's that "she" has no problem asking your mother to change her schedule? [/quote]

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