Reply to Tell me about separating and divorcing with a young baby

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It is hard to know if he is abusive or if it is frustration and impatience and you two have a really unhealthy dynamic. [b]Withholding / refusing sex[/b] for a year in a marriage is a sign that you are just as frustrated but express it a little differently. Both of you are trying to get power and control where you can. Just a guess but he [b]might also feel you are never or rarely nice to him either[/b].

It will be hard but unless you are going to go to counseling and work through it and develop better communication and a healthier way of relating - divorce is really your only option as you can't both live like this in a resentful, sexless marriage.

[/quote]

OP here - I don't think of it as withholding, I just really don't want to do it. I'm afraid of him, always walking on eggshells. I think he does lately feel like I'm not nice to him either. I used to be sweet and make effort to be kind to him no matter what, but after a while his behavior wore me down and now I find I'm becoming more and more like him. [/quote]

Call it what you want but your husband didn't likely anticipate a sexless marriage / dead bedroom situation. That is a pretty big revelation for a man to find out about his marriage / wife and typically leads to resentment and frustration. Did you have sex just to get pregnant because you wanted a baby before you left him? Was he on board with having a child?

This sounds like a marriage of two bitter resentful people who don't really like each other anymore and don't treat each other well. Divorce sounds like a good option as the child isn't going to make things better.[/quote]

Can you read? They were told they were infertile. If you think you're infertile, it's unlikely you have sex just to try to get pregnant. That's not how the world works. Also, being afraid of your partner is not really conducive to intimacy. [/quote]

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