Reply to I think that my husband wants our kids to be failures

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[quote=Anonymous]
I'm 12:42 (first page).

My own husband has very different, but very serious issues. I have zero problems explaining his behavior to the children, and why I don't agree with him, and why the children should do what I say, not what he says.

When a marriage is in distress like this, and parents don't work as a team, the one who has the children's trust wins. It's the work of many years, OP.You can't start too early. You have to prove to them that you are there for the no matter what, and are willing to spend time with them and help them. You have to be more persuasive, in both word and action.

Don't think that children prefer the lax parent! Kids love people who they see acting on their behalf. They don't necessarily appreciate the car driver who never talks to them, they appreciate the one putting aside their own work to explain the math homework in a loving (not screaming) way. When trust is there, children are perfectly ready to accept a stricter form of parenting.

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