Reply to I want to feel like my husband actually cares

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]He did try to get you tomato soup and pick you up at least, even though you didn't want tomato soup. He sounds stretched beyond his abilities. In the grand scheme of things, you have a 1 year old so you are probably both sleep deprived. His brain is not functioning. He needs naps, he's too lazy to use his body, he goes to Panera and eats and then totally forgets why he's there in the first place, he is not even listening to you when you told him a zillion times to get broccoli soup. I keep like 6 things of chicken and beef broth in my pantry for times like these.  If he still acts like this when your kids are school age, it doesn't bode well.  I'd let it go because you are cranky because you just had surgery and you have a small child. Just prepare better next time and don't expect him to do anything useful.[/quote]
You are missing the points.

OP did prepare soft foods, but the post-op instructions were more limiting than she expected. And it's not that she doesn't *want* tomato soup, it's that she's not allowed to eat it per those limited post-op instructions.

This really does seem like a situation where the best-laid plans can go awry. And you need to be able to rely on your partner to help with those things. I guess a useful question to ask is whether, if something similar happened with their son, OP thinks her DH would step up. Her gut response will be very telling as to the extent to which she believes her DH cares deep down. For me, DH would never be as absent-minded as OP's, but I could see him getting the wrong order (though usually he'd call to confirm). And I truly believe he'd be just as likely to make the same kinds of mistakes for our kids, or even himself, as he would for me.[/quote]

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