Reply to Where is the line between emotional abuse and regular arguments?

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Reply to "Where is the line between emotional abuse and regular arguments?"

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[quote=Anonymous]In the past year I for sure have become verbally abusive in my relationship. This is why I am initiating a divorce now.

During the beginning and middle of our marriage I would try to raise issues calmly and normally without personal attacks, and I would get variations of "You are imagining this." "You just need to change your perspective." "This is your own fault." etc. etc. etc.

Finally, I graduated to screaming insults to get through my point of view. Interestingly this "worked" in that after going absolutely batshit crazy my STBXH is suddenly willing to acknowledge my point of view, but not one second before that point.

He doesn't want to get divorced and wants to work on our relationship, but I am done. I have had relationships where there was on-going mutual respect, and it's highly preferred!

Anyway, my point is - this topic is complicated. But if your partner is more about winning than about mutually agreeable solutions, that is the danger zone in my view. [/quote]

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