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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’m the youngest of 6– and we still all get a long, holidays are very fun and I loved growing up with a big family even though my parents were stretched very thin financially. 
I don’t think my parents did anything in particular to foster the healthy relationships we all have with each other-[b] maybe they didn’t make us competitive with each other[/b]? I’m not sure, but I would love to have a big family. That being said my husband is happy with the two we have and does not want anymore. Hopefully they will get along! He only has one sibling but even though they get along they still barely talk except an occasional phone call checking in with each other here and there. [/quote]

This is the key. Parents that foster competition and create resentment through favoritism basically ensure their children will never be close as adults. MIL and DIL have been periodically estranged from their siblings and now DH and his brother are estranged. They always point out how different (and wrong!) their siblings’ behaviors and choices are, rather than appreciating what each contributes to their lives. It is so different from the “team family” attitude my military family grew up with. There was never a question of whether there was love or that the family would endure.

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