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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Your husband has too much time on his hands and/or  you're not paying him enough attention. .

In my 20s I had an affair with an older married man.  Huge mistake but that's another story.  Looking back I can tell his wife was MIA and was focused on everything except for him.  So many men and women simply want attention.  Not saying it's right or justified, but it seems like human nature.  If your husband is communicating with this many women he also has too much time. The married man I was with spent hours talking to me and now in old age I realize how strange it is that he could give me this much time.  [/quote]

NP here.  It takes two people to maintain a marriage.  The problem with marrying a narcissist is that they don't pull their weight.  They expect you to do all the childcare, taking care of the house/yard, and taking care of them.  I am divorcing one now.  Getting anything I needed from the marriage was worse than major surgery.  According to him, he was perfect and didn't have to change a single thing he was doing, but I had to change everything about myself.  If the wife is MIA, he's also equally not taking care of her.  You basically try to lead your own happy life in spite of the fact that the other person is trying to make you miserable on purpose.  They try to drive you crazy, so you have to distance yourself from them in order to protect your self and your sanity.  He gave you that much time, because it was his choice to do so.  Not because his wife wasn't taking care of him.  He was "love-bombing" you and showering you with positive attention.  They do that and they are very good at it.[/quote]

How do you know he was a narcissist?  You paint the wife as innocent and 100 percent the victim and claim the man has a personality disorder.  Can you not imagine there might be men out there who cheat because they are unhappy?  [/quote]

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