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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Just how hard is it to get damn canola?[/quote]

Canola contains omega 6 fatty acids, we already get too much of those. [/quote]

Controlling much?[/quote]

Is OP preventing DH from buying canola and cooking with it?  Doubt it. [/quote]

+1. Buying some other oil and cooking his own food would be the easy solution if is really were about personal preference, but it's not. It's about OP's husband looking for excuse to criticize and belittle her.

OP, if you don't have kids (and perhaps even if you do), i agree with the others saying to get out now. This isn't the example you want for kids of a healthy relationship. It's not even a marriage counseling issue really (although maybe marriage counseling would help him realize his own personal problems), it's one he needs to recognize and commit to working on in himself, probably with the help of a skilled therapist of his own.[/quote]

+1  It will get worse.  Mine started with wanted to "show" me how to cook, how to shop, what music was best, what TV was bad.  He doesn't like the way I dress so he calls me a librarian, gets bent out of shape when I want to work on my garden because I don't "do it right".  He is OCD and it just chipped away at my self esteem until I stopped doing things myself except at work, where I excelled without the constant criticism.

Unfortunately, we have kids.  We have been in therapy for more than a year.  He acknowledges he is critical but as soon as he is agitated about something, it is all out the window.  I go to therapy to help me handle how to respond, and to learn coping tools.  If we did not have kids, I would be gone.  For now, it just sucks.

Part of the issue is if you don't get the positive.  If you got compliments, you probably would be able to weather a canola oil comment.  If you only get negative, you may be at a point where the slightest comment just sounds like more of the same.  Unfortunately, you have to rely on him to reduce the critical and increase the positive.  The most you can do is to model positive and try to give him slack if you see improvement to give him positive reinforcement.

Sorry OP.  It is tough.[/quote]

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