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[quote=Anonymous]OP, DW here but otherwise I was in your shoes several years ago.  I found bottles hidden, DH was acting strange, falling asleep on the couch at 7pm, lots of things you describe.  I could go on for pages but really want to give you 2 bits of advice right now.  1) dont take “I promise I’ll stop” for an answer.  She needs a program.  AA might be enough if she does it properly, with a sponsor and all that, but just going to a few meetings may not be enough.  Kolmac has an intensive outpatient program with medical supervision that you might want to check out.  FWIW, I took “I promise I’ll stop 2x; after the 3rd time finding vodka in his water glass I told him to be in rehab within 24 hours or packed and gone.  He really needed the help of a rigorous program.  2) take care of your family, and also go easy on yourself.  Over the next few years you will probably realize this has been going on under your nose for ages.   you may think you should have figured it out, and you will be angry with yourself and question a lot of things about yourself and your marriage.  dont beat yourself up about it.  Al Anon will help with this.

Hugs to you.  I wouldn’t wish this on my worst enemy. [/quote]

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