Reply to Men: does a woman playing hard to get really work?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
OP here. Sure, I guess it would be manipulative- but hate the game, not the player. I don't want to be some back burner b*tch. He is still calling and texting and wants to get together, I'm just trying to figure out how to navigate so I don't come across as desperate. I could get a date, easily, but this guy is a real catch and I want to play my cards right. [/quote]

There is no game, other than what you are choosing to play. He isn't making you a "back burner b*tch*. Like you, he felt that maybe you guys in dove in too quickly and too aggressively. You said "Last week he spearheaded, but I agreed with, deciding to slow down."  Are you treating him like a "back burner b*tch" because you also feel the same way? Rather than just pulling back he talked about it with you so that you wouldn't misinterpret his modest slowing down the pace of the relationship as a lack of interest.  He has continued to text you and show interest in dating you. He has been forthright and communicative with you and you basically want to act like an asshole in return.

I think that you are not used to feeling this strongly and it is causing you to become defensive and panicky and desperate to assert what you perceive as control. But there is never control and you will alienate him if you do what you're planning. Acting like an asshole will draw assholes to you. It won't keep nice people. [/quote]

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