Reply to Is it tough for nova kids to make friends at Ivys?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It's a common complaint made in novels written by former Ivy Leaguers. So the perception that true middle class kids struggle a bit socially when surrounded by many with extreme wealth must have some basis in reality.[/quote]

[b]Do you mean like F. Scott Fitzgerald?[/b]

Because now it's more like the kids from "extreme wealth" are surrounded by middle and upper middle class kids (and have to adjust to the fact that the latter typically work harder and are more ambitious than they are).[/quote]

No modern novels. The Love Affairs By Nathaniel P. by Adelle Waldman made this complaint.[/quote]

I haven't read the book - perhaps I should - but be mindful that it's a bit of a rite of passage for middle and upper middle class kids to emphasize their adjustments to the Ivy League to underscore that they were not themselves "to the manor born."

It's left to others, of course, to point out that they may have been "to the very nice subdivision born" or "to the highly-ranked suburban high school bred."  [/quote]

Oh the author is actually really careful to point out Nate's privileges and blind spots. It's sort of the point of the novel (the way a "nice" guy raised progressively in the supposedly feminist 90s sees and treats women). It's a really good read, if you like fiction.

As to a point that a PP made, in the novel it's not really money that trips Nate up but more the cultural knowledge he lacks: how the other kids dress, what kinds of cars they drive, what they talk about, where they've traveled. Also the extended social network based on boarding school, certain exclusive independent day schools, and summer camps up and down the east coast that he's not tied into.[/quote]

I think kids who get into Ivies tend to pick up some of this "cultural knowledge" by osmosis, and that it's probably not as relevant today as it might have been even 20-30 years ago.  But in any event, the fact that some fraction of Ivy kids come from such "extended social networks" won't stop others from making plenty of friends.

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