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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Big Law sucks.  And it's a slow realization sometimes, and it is hard to see that before kids.  BUT, I have little sympathy for anyone over the age of 28 who still falls into the golden handcuffs trap.  Basically, you can't have it both ways - the great salary and an involved co-patent.

Is he a partner?  Or a senior associate on partner track?

Long term - he needs to set boundaries and/or you need to move to a house you can afford on half his salary.   The problem with Big Law is if you've set the expectation that you respond to emails right away,  that's what clients and partners expect.   If he's not specialized enough and isn't a partner, he may not be able to set these boundaries now because the clients and partners think he's fungible.   But, that also means he may not be likely to make partner and will have to find a new job soon.  If he's partner - he may end up making less of a draw.

Mid term - don't have another baby.

Short term - set up interviews with babysitters and tell him he can either make the time, or suck it up.  You have to set boundaries too.

Big law associate (part-time, mommy tracked, but a specialist so who knows what the hell will happen) who is the primary breadwinner and still does bedtime solo at least half the week.   We bought a house with a mortgage that was half the amount we were approved for and have one kid.  [/quote]

Excellent advice  [/quote]

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