Reply to My mother's boyfriend is a bigot

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[quote=Anonymous]"It all points to a pattern of isolating my mother from her support system. We already live hours away. Cutting us out from speaking to her or seeing her...it was a textbook setting the stage for abuse."

THIS times a thousand.

My best friend's mother -- a nice mid-western widowed housewife -- was murdered by her boyfriend when she tried to break up with him.  If she had been 18, we would have seen the signs of a controlling, manipulative, abusive relationship and tried to intervene.  But she was an "adult," of an age we respected, and we just didn't think about their relationship that way.  Please do everything you can to convey to your mother that her personal safety is in danger.  My own mother, dating in her mid-60s, has had a couple of scary dating experiences.  She went to our local police at one point for help with a particularly aggressive guy who started threatening her.  They were fantastic about it, and called him and told him to cut it out (which actually worked, to my surprise).  I imagine big city police departments might not care, but in a smaller community I think it can be helpful to let police know there's a problem.  If nothing else, it will help them see a pattern down the road.

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