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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. I wanted to give an update and get some advice since my mother has been showing some signs of not being willing to cut the guy off. First, we asked her to block him on her cell phone repeatedly. She claimed she did, flubbed it, but apparently, it's done now. She hasn't changed her landline, which he has been calling constantly. We keep asking her to do so but she's resistant ("I've had this number since 1966"). It's strange and I'm worried what she wants is some sort of closure that entails actually talking to him.

I don't think she's processed how much danger she -- and we all -- were in last weekend. I don't think she's processed how much danger she's in now. I think she thinks were being lovingly over protective. She's going to see her therapist today, but I don't know what else we can do to help her understand the gravity of the situation.

Any insights or guidance is appreciated. Thanks.[/quote]

OP, I would take what you wrote here; gather your family members with your mom; and basically read her most of this post. A safety intervention, if you will. If some members live too far away, patch them in via Skype if need be. Layla should be there if Layla is OK with that.

Maybe being in a room face to face with as many of you as possible, all saying, this is NOT normal, would wake her up.

Does her town have a police department that might have a community liaison officer? I would push hard to get a liaison officer to meet with her ASAP in person to explain what harassment and stalking look like and why she needs to change all her numbers and possibly take a "vacation" for a while. She may need to hear a police officer -- not her own children-- say, "Do not seek ANY closure, do not let him 'explain himself' on the phone, by text or email or especially in person" etc.

Your mom just may not be able to believe the ex would hurt her. She may be socialized as many women are, to "not make a fuss" and "let it go." That's why she might need to have an officer bluntly say to her face not to engage in any form.

And I really would try to get her out of town if at all possible. That may sound like running away or caving to fear, but it actually could give her space to think, especially if he is calling her constantly (and you and siblings may need to push her hard on changing her number on the land line). [/quote]

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