Reply to 360-lb family member... No plans to lose weight. Odds of heart attack?

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Reply to "360-lb family member... No plans to lose weight. Odds of heart attack?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]How is his quality of life? I mean, is he happy? [/quote]
He is unmarried, lives with his parents, unemployed, very angry all the time. [/quote]
Well, these are what need to be addressed. The weight is most likely a byproduct of all of these other issues.
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To all the PPs who have accused me of being insensitive, we rarely comment on his weight. I think everyone is very gentle with him. He sometimes doesn't leave his room for days or bathe for weeks. Occasionally, we will ask him to improve his hygiene. He has had some health issues and claims that they have opened his eyes but he continues with his same habits. He eats healthy in front of family but he has a car and it is littered with McDonald's bags.

He has a small income of about $500/week from a family trust, so he isn't completely destitute. His living expenses are mostly taken care of by his parents. It's just very exhausting being concerned for him, because I worry what will happen 15-20 years from now and who will be responsible for him.

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Why exhaust yourself being concerned for him?  He's an adult, you can't make him do anything, and taking any sort of parental action to make him change his ways is out of bounds.  He's responsible for himself -- he has a $2000/month allowance, and, if he's not capable of holding a job when his parents aren't around to coddle him, he can apply for SSDI or other assistance.  Caring for someone is not the same as having to assume responsibility for them.  I have family members who make poor decisions, including those related to their health, and commenting on those decisions has never made a difference or improved a relationship.[/quote]

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