Reply to Trying to prevent having an affair with my co-worker

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote]

You knew you had to get away from this guy, and get another job if necessary, oh probably 17 months ago, but you didn't do it because you enjoyed all the attention and validation. That is shameful enough. But if you haven't crossed the line yet, it is not too late to do this (i.e., get another job away from him).

That's terrible advice, if she otherwise enjoys her job, you can't just pick up at 40+ easily and start over. Just stay away from this guy. Be professional and courteous, but that's it. Focus on your work and be an adult.

That's terrible advice. If she were able to be professional and courteous and stay away from this guy and focus on her work, she would have done that already. Instead she's been obsessing about him for 18 months AND she has been talking to him about having an affair. If she remains in his presence every day, the obsession will continue and it will definitely transition into physicality if it hasn't already. She needs to get another job. Or she can blow up her marriage and get both of them fired, whatever. [/quote]
So in addition to being a big baby about her crush on this guy, you also think she should blow up her career?  I think she should pull it together and grow up.  [/quote]

It's going to blow up her career to have an affair with her boss. Boss-subordinate affairs rarely end well, professionally, for subordinate women. She can avoid that professional pain, as well as all the personal pain of blowing up her family, by getting a new job.

Job changes happen all the time. Getting a new job isn't going to blow up her career. More likely to be a spur to new growth because she will channel all the energy now being spent on obsessing about her boss into her actual day job.[/quote]

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