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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Why are you bothering to confront him?  What do you hope to gain?  Do you live together?  Any kids?[/quote]

No to both. As for the reason, I guess I would like to know why. Crazy, right? Once a cheater, always a cheater. [/quote]

He's a cheater. THis means that he has lied to you about many many things for a long time.  What makes you think that he will magically tell you the truth about this if you confront him? If he were capable of accurately identifying his feelings and discussing them in a highly conflictual environment, do you think he would have cheated?

You are a rational person, who is seeking to have a rational conversation with someone who has demonstrated that they do not have the skills to do so.

Personally, I would confont him because I would want him to know that I knew the score and I would be personally curious to see his reaction.  But the meet would be in a public place. The conversation would be extremely short:  "I 've found out you've cheated on me. I am breaking up with you.  Please do not contact me in any way ever again."

Then walk away.  Do not engage in listening to any explanations or justifications.  Cut off all contact.  If you see him in public ignore him.  Block his phone and email, unfriend him on all social media, etc.  If you have mutual friends that you still want to see, I'd just provide a brief explanation - "I found out he cheated and I broke up with him." Refuse to discuss anything further.  If friends can't respect that boundary, drop them.

You've wasted 5 years with him.  Don't waste a minute more of time or effort or care on him.[/quote]

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