Reply to Men- when is sex an emotional experience for you?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Can a DW chime in?  :lol:    I like to have sex with my DH because a) I love him, b) he is likable and my best friend, c) I am attracted to him and d) I have needs.  When I am having sex with him  I just want to give and receive pleasure.  I am not thinking of love or emotions.  When he brings me my morning cup of coffee in bed? That is an emotional  and loving experience!

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This is a rhetorical, argumentative question: If love and emotion aren't the basis of your sexual relationship, then would it bother you if your husband had a FWB? What you seem to describe is purely physical interaction that does not bond the relationship with intimacy. So why not have multiple sex partners and one 'emotional' partner? Of course I'm being facetious, but it's worth all of us thinking and talking about the nature, meaning, and role of sex within a relationship.  [/quote]

Love and emotion+ attraction + need + matrimony are the factors  that get me to bed with him. Once in bed it is physical.  If my husband gets a FWB, it will be hard for me to forgive him and I won't want to have sex with him. At that point it does not matter if sex is physical.  All that matters it that sex  will not happen.  Two different things.

I also want to add that if I love and respect my husband as a person, but find him unattractive or inept in bed  or I do not have a physical need for sex - I will be hard pressed to have sex with him just because I love him. The physical lust and the sexual need is also a component in getting to bed with a person, and these two are not emotional things. These are physical or chemical things.

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