Reply to Anyone's slacker teen feel entitled to an exciting spring break?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think he could have shed some guidance on how to get a job or a volunteer position. Clearly your kid is not a self starter, but you might have left too much up to him to figure out in an area where he is obviously weak.

I somehow get the feeling you just don't like your kid much, and that is why the punishment. You wish he was a travel sport type and he's not.[/quote]

Trust me, I put countless specific activities on a platter, he didn't want to do anything. He preferred to sit on his ass doing nothing for the hours his friends were active after school.

And no, he's not an introvert that prefers to storm through books alone in his room.[/quote]

Activities on a platter isn't the "how" if your kid finds it hard to start.  I think you have no idea how hard it is to be thirteen. He may very well be a slacker, but I don't think you are re approaching this in a way that reflects his issues and not your issues.

I don't know you and your kid, but your stubborn insistence that you did this right and it is all about your kid.... well let's just say it is only going to get worse for you as your kid progresses into the really hard years of being a teen. They are extremely humbling years to stubborn parents.  [/quote]

Even at 16. My kid was very, very immature at 15.  Seriously immature.  How many ways was I supposed to punish him for that one simple fact?  I don't know if it was OP who answered me or not, but I will assume it is:

*  you sound like you don't like your kid and think he is a loser.
* your kid hears that every day in your interactions.
* this will make him less likely not more likely to get off his ass, if that really is the problem.
* this doesn't bode well for your relationship going forward.  
* when he looks back on his life, you don't want him to sound like the woman whose parents punished her when she was depressed (I appreciate your candor, PP).  She does not look back on her childhood as a period when her parents had her back.

He's 16, not 13.[/quote][/quote]

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