Reply to Being average when you know they can do better

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[quote=Anonymous]Op.  I do think this is a personality thing.  I am highly gifted and fit the mold perfectly.  I refused all help and learned and achieved on my terms.  I did read a bunch of stuff like support your kid and they will bloom.  So i Did. I support and wait for where i can fit in.  Then to my surprise , my kids dont have much creativity or inspiration.  I guess personally im at a lost. I do think it could be my parenting style but leading seems very manipulative. I talk to parents who plan out clever ways to incentivize their kids to do x or y.  I do not do that at all. I want them to ask for what they want.  I do suggest. Hey would you like x? If they say no, they dont do.  They choose what they want to do. My issue is they dont choose much.  I dont make my kids achieve because they arent. Im just surprised they arent choosing when they can.

Also my kids do have a high quality of things but we dont have help.  No cleaning lady, no baby sitters, etc. Our oldest gets kids from bus until we come home. We have a chore list that is inclusive of everything.  Laundry, kitchen prep, sweeping, trash, bathrooms, room, vacuum. They bring their lunches.   Everything.  They are ambivalent about it.if reminded, they will do.   Partially It is they have nothing they want other than candy or gum.  They read and say they get  books for free. Some $ goes toward online games.

They are very frugal. They look at everything with a cost benefit.  If its low probability of success they always pick a sure thing with no risk.  There are some inlaws who have this personality so maybe it comes from there? Its not about me but i am just surprised by this because its so different than me. [/quote]

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