Reply to Talk me out of an affair.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I was in a very similary situation as you (except I was harboring some (deserved) resentment for my husband, but all in all, he's a good person, [b]we had a stable, good marriage[/b]). I had the affair.

I can't say I regret it (I don't. I still don't) But I can say it has really really wrecked my marriage. We are working on it, but it is very very very difficult. Yes,  I fell for the guy, I initiated, we went for it. When I write this out I look like a jerk, having fallen for a guy, don't regret it, still married. But, children, and a long history of a stable, good marriage.

But if your marriage is in a good place, do not do it. As PPs have said, your marriage can recover, it will never be the same, for both you and your spouse. You'll never love your spouse the same way, and vice versa.[/quote]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. You had a good marriage, but you cheated, crushed him and have no regret. I have news for you: You did not have a good marriage.

Because in a good marriage, you would not have cheated and even if you did, you sure as hell would regret it.

You are cold, evil and actually in a very shitty marriage.[/quote]

So funny that you say that. There is a contingent here who will insist that the marriage is FINE, a person can be happily married and still cheat, and it is the cheater who is a twisted, broken, evil person.

So, what is it, DCUM. Was my marriage FINE or was it FUCKED? Make up your collective mind.  I'd say both, actually, but that is way too nuanced for a message board.

[/quote]

I think any marriage with an affair is not fine. There is no way you can convince me that this betrayal, deception happens in a good marriage. Maybe it is the case that once that stuff happens the marriage goes from good to bad. And I happen to believe most cheaters are more broken and sad than evil.[/quote]

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