Reply to If you aren't sexually attracted to your spouse

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am genuinely curious about the psychology of the men in this thread. What do you think I'm projecting based on my posts? [/quote]

You are comparing something as crucial as sexual intimacy in marriage - the glue that holds a marriage together - as trivial as whether a child gets vanilla or chocolate cake.

Of course starving children are more important globally than anything in a particular marriage.  But you don't seem to grasp the gravity that the failure of a satisfying sexual relationship has on marriage[/quote]

It's a metaphor not a comparison. The entire party is sex, the cake is one component. I'm saying it sounds like you have a good sex life bit are hung up on one aspect that is not exactly as you want it and telling you you should be looking at the positive.

Still not sure what you think I was projecting though. [/quote]

I assume you are projecting that you don't see satisfying sex as crucial to one's happiness.  That's fine.  A lot of people see sex like dessert, great when you get it and it's good but not essential.  You dismiss OPs desire to find sex with his wife and his ability to please his wife in the process as whining because, hey, he's having sex so shut up about the quality[/quote]

You assume wrong. I am more OP than his DW in my marriage (the initiator). I am saying that by his own description he has a lot of positive (even in the sex arena), so why dwell on the negative? No one gets everything they want, if you get most of it then you're lucky.

The only thing you should read into my post is that I have experienced something truly terrible and it gives me the perspective to be very very grateful for all the things that are good about my DH instead of harping on the fact that he doesn't initiate sex enough. [/quote]

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