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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b]Unfortunately the standard is now that you work FT and handle all logistics, planning etc. 
[/b]
I don’t recommend having kids unless you go in with eyes wide open about this.

Even if your husband is supportive of you staying home, it’s a terrible move because it places you in a precarious position. [/quote]

^^This. You need to realize, OP, that you are competing with women who will provide to a man all the benefits of SAHM (bear the mental load, handle all the newborn stuff while healing from a major medical event, clean, caretake, be first line of defense when kid is sick) and also be pulling in a few hundred Ks of salary. How do you market yourself to be more attractive than that?[/quote]

Are women really competing to marry men like this?  Why would anyone put up with this if they were capable of pulling in a few hundred KS of salary? At that point it makes absolute sense to me to save and plan for single parenthood ( as a PP suggested) while remaining open to finding the right  partner.[/quote]

PP who suggested single parenthood. As someone else said above, ingrained societal expectation is death by a thousand cuts. That's why I try to bring this suggestion up in the conversation. I see a question like this one from OP and it's not even a consideration. The default is look for a man to have a kid. I want to change the conversation. I wish it had felt like more of a conscious choice when I was in my early 30s. [/quote]

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