Reply to Gender Tropes, Reluctant Truths

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]PP said it was about having rules & rituals (“scenes”) as well as being submissive. And then also said there actually is some BM. Question is who is submissive in the bedroom.

So…very much like BDSM. [/quote]

Semantics. My point is that while gender is mostly a social construct it's not entirely inextricable from biology either. Whether you're getting tied up or not, women, on avg, are attracted to guys who can take charge and having clearly defined roles of who is responsible for what is helpful for that.[/quote]

Wanting to have the power taken away is an extremely common sexual fantasy.  Whether it's some sort of role play where you're some low level employee that's been told to "earn that promotion", a prostitute fantasy, or even a rape fantasy.  If you have any of those fantasies or a myriad of others where your power is being taken away, congrats, you're just kind of basic.  But that's okay.  Role play can be fun.  That being said, you're conflating role play fantasy with real life.  Someone might have a rape or prostitution fantasy but that doesn't mean that they literally want to be raped or a prostitute.  When it comes to real life, people have dreams and goals that are rooted in reality, not fantasy.  Many people want to do something they feel will make their life meaningful, whatever that means for themselves.  For some people it's working a career.  For others it's raising children and not working.  None of this means that all or even most women want a power imbalance in their daily lives.  If you get turned on by scrubbing the toilets every day and never having your husband do it, by all means go for it but I don't think that's a common thing people want.  If you are aroused by having no job and spouse that has one then go for it but that doesn't mean everyone (or most people) want that.  And sexual fantasy has it's place but it's not rooted in real life.[/quote]

It isn’t a sexual gratification/arousal exercise for me. It is a role I am comfortable with and brings me joy.  I love being a housewife/stay at home mom/stepford wife/dutiful wife whatever tag society wants to put on it or describe it.

It is who I am at my core. It allows me a great amount freedom and it allows for a very intense and satisfying intimate relationship with my husband but my daily activities are motivated by sex or sexual thoughts.  [/quote]

Who you are is absolutely fine BUT there were people here making the claim that all women (or nearly all?) are happier in this dynamic which is absolutely not true.[/quote]

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