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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The religion of my family of origin had so many negative implications for me, but it was mostly because we were only 50% committed to [b]a religion that requires 100% commitment to work, so I was stuck in a pattern of participation and rebellion. [/b] The teachings were so strongly ingrained that every time I'd pull away, I'd come back and just get stuck in a cycle of shame and self loathing.  I don't want to call out the religion because I am still so entrenched that even after being out of it for almost 20 years, I would feel like an apostate, for which there is no redemption.

When I was a teenager,[b] I used to have to attend yearly meetings or confessions with a church leader, who was always a man, alone in a room. [/b] He would ask me questions that were totally inappropriate for any middle aged man to ask a young girl alone, without her parents present, about things I didn't even understand yet.  I left feeling so violated and distrustful of men.

Most damaging of all, I was taught that sex outside of marriage is a sin second only to murder.  So when I slipped up and had sex with my BF at 19, I felt like I had to marry him to make things right.  What followed was 10 years of a terrible marriage for both of us, but mostly for me.  He is not a good man (and his a criminal record for evidence of his poor character), and I suffered greatly, and leaving was extremely difficult because I am the first person in my family to ever get a divorce, and in my family's religion, [b]marriages are forever. [/b] I have to raise a child with a man who is a terrible person and even more terrible coparent.  It cost me so much.  Happy ending - I left, remained single for quite a while and [b]my career took off (which is unusual for a woman in my family and from my community and religion[/b]), eventually met a great man was raised in another religion who is so compassionate and understanding, and we have made a mostly happy life together, but I still struggle with all the consequences of my past.  Fortunately, my family chose to love and support me even after I left the church and started a new life that doesn't look like the life they wanted for me.   [/quote]
LDS, right?[/quote]

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