Reply to Can someone explain the mindset of a cheater?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Cheating PP, if you’re so convicted your wife knows what you’re up to, why would it blow up her life or blow up the marriage to get it out in the open?  Both of you obviously have reasons to stay married, would it not be a relief to not have to pretend anymore?

FWIW I’m a woman and I’m not ruling out the possibility she knows and has chosen to look the other way, particularly if she’s a sham - seen this kind of willful blindness on more than one occasion, just don’t see the point. [/quote]She isn't a SAHM.  I'm OK with how things are right now.  It could only get worse by telling her.  I don't need that kind of relief and to me it's like throwing it in her face when she would rather pretend it didn't exist.  Yes, there I go thinking for her again.  Also, as I've mentioned before, there is another person in this.  My AP and her marriage.  If you've never done this before then maybe you don't understand but I owe it to her to keep our relationship a secret.  Even if I were willing to let the pieces fall as they may be telling my W, she certainly isn't.  I'll let her have her willful blindness.  [/quote]

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