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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Gosh, I have so many failures.  I know I take the prize for being the biggest failure on DCUM.  Lets see:

1)  Went to a top college.  Dropped out of pre med in college and got a useless BA in history instead, graduated with honors but always floundered when it came to career direction.  Spent college partying, dating and having fun.  Got good grades but completely directionless whenI graduated.

2)  I never really had much of a career.  Always had "small" jobs and never managed to have a big one.  Never really even had what anyone would call a "career."  Right after college got a masters in a field I hated because my parents insisted I get this degree.  They paid for school, I managed to do well in school but hated every minute of it.   After my grad degree I hated the field so much that I worked in a completely unrelated field in a series of low paying, awful jobs.  Never made more than 35K.  Worked retail for a year for lack of being able to find a better job.

3)  Did a post bacc pre med program at age 30 to try to get into the field I wanted (medicine).  Always wanted to be a doctor, it was my lifelong dream.  Took the MCAT twice, worked in a hospital, completed my post bacc (all my pre med courses) with a 3.5 GPA, even organic chemistry.  Applied to 50 med schools. Accepted to zero.  Decided to retake MCAT, no improvement.  My self esteem was crushed and never recovered.

4) After that decided to enter a less competitive field that could finally be my "career."  Worked part time in this field (couldn't find a full time job in it) for 3 years.  Applied to grad school in this field, got in.  Very unprestigious field with crappy pay.  Did very well in grad school (second masters).

5)  Took 9 months to get my first job in new field.  Landed what I thought was my dream job.  Worked there 2 years and did mediocre in the job due to an awful, micromanaging boss and unpleasant work environment.  I liked the work very much though and was good at it for the most part.  Got average performance reviews, some were below average.  I've never been able to do well in the work setting.  Made 40 K.  No one liked me at that job.  I felt that this career was another mistake.  Resigned when I gave birth and became a full-time SAHM.

6)  Husband and I moved a bunch in our 20s and 30s and I was never able to make a circle of friends.  Had no one to invite to our wedding so we eloped.  Had no one to invite to my baby shower so didn't have one.  Never had any of the traditional female milestones: no wedding shower, no bachlorette party, no baby shower.  Had a few good friends from college but they were scattered all over the country.  Spent most of my 20s and 30s very, very lonely as we lived in new places where we knew no one and spouse worked 80 hours per week and no family around.  Moved here not knowing anyone and couldn't make friends for the first 5 years.

7)  Spouse and I have an awful relationship with his family (dysfunctional) and they live in California, and my family lives in Hawaii so we only see extended family once a year.  Feel constantly lonely and alone due to lack of a close by, loving family and few friends.  Spend every holiday alone. Feel sad for my daughter that she won't grow up with any family around.

8)  Could not lose the baby weight despite only gaining 25 pounds with the pregnancy and am now "plus size" despite dieting.  I don't look good and don't feel good.  My body aches everywhere and I feel physically crappy most of the time.

9)  Have severe anxiety which I am seeing a therapist for but it's not really helping.  Marriage is stressed because of my anxiety problem.  Been married 14 years.

As you can see, biggest failure on DCUM.  When I think about all the time and money I wasted on my schooling with no career to show for it it makes me feel awful.  It was helpful to get all that written out and see just how huge of a failure I am.  I don't know how to work on this huge list of failures. Therapy for these issues didn't help.

[/quote]

PP, I just want to say how awesome I think it is that you took all of those pre-med classes, took the MCAT, and actually applied to medical school. That took such guts, hard work and intelligence!  I quit pre-med in college because I didn't think I was smart enough.  I ended up going to law school, and I absolutely hated practicing law.  When I was 35, I started taking all of the pre-med classes.  Between working and having my daughter, and the fact that new prereqs. like biochemistry and statistics were added, it took me seven years to finish.  I am now in my 40s and terrified to take the new MCAT (for those who don't know, they made it a lot harder in 2015) and to apply because now I am too old and I don't feel that I can compete with millenials who have been trained since birth to do this.  But you, PP, you did it!  You put yourself out there, threw caution to the wind, and gave it your all! I know how hard it is to take classes and do labs with 18-year old undergrads and to have to answer questions from family and friends about why on earth you are doing this.  But, you did it, PP, and no one can ever take that away from you.  Do you realize how few people in this country have done all of that? I don't know you, but I am so proud of you.          [/quote]

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