Reply to Do you consider race when looking for a neighborhood to live in?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote]We have an AA couple + kids on our block in CC. I'm a white person, so I don't get it 100%, but I think I understand the concerns (fear of random stops by the locals cops, being a suburban pioneer, how will the other kids treat my kids, etc.), and I have no doubt that they are rational. But in honesty I don't think you would be treated significantly differently than other neighbors. (Its not like we're all hosting daily evening neighborhood BBQs and hosting swingers evenings.)[/quote]

I'm the one who first posted doubts about CC.  It's a whole host of things, not just how neighbors treat you.  I'm not trying to be facetious or snarky, but you're right that you don't get it 100% - I"m not sure it's possible for you to know or think about all the ways discriminatory behavior can happen.  One PP mentioned fear of her husband getting harassed for jogging through his own neighborhood. My husband and I went to a party at a friend's house and the caterer, thinking I was part of her staff, jumped on me for using the guest bathroom.  It's these seemingly insignificant "oops" moments, some innocuous and some pretty harmful, that can add up.  My main concern is unconscious bias from teachers and school administrators.   Small things with big impact that are hard to talk about, harder to prove, but factor into decisions about where to live.  Especially if I'm paying ballpark $1 million for a house.[/quote]

OMG how did u handle that? that reminded me of that crazy story Melody Hobson  Princeton Grad and Billionaire George Lucas wife told about hosting a fundraiser for a black politician and showing up only to be taken to the back room by a "manager" and questioned why she wasn't in the proper attire for the event. Women thought Melody was there as part of the wait staff[/quote]
She is not just his wife
She is President  of a Capital Management company, author, and TV personality[/quote]

Never heard of her, so had to look her up--she's amazing!  Apparently she inspired Sheryl Sandberg to write Lean In.  Thanks, DCUM!

http://www.vanityfair.com/news/2015/03/mellody-hobson-ariel-investments-fighting-stereotype[/quote]

So where the other black people at that event, including the AA politician, treated the same way? Or were there no other AA people in attendance except for Melody?

My point is, how can you assert that her race is what caused her to be mistaken as the wait staff? [/quote]
How can you assert that it was not. It is amazing to me that plenty of folks can come on here and write about their experiences, or IRL tell someone about their experience and for the most part it is taken for face value that the person writing/speaking has an accurate assessment of the situation that they were, you know, actually in! However, when a POC tries to say they were in situation that was racist/offensive/insensitive, their perspective is picked apart 500 ways to Sunday.
It.Is.Tiresome[/quote]

I see that logical reasoning is not one of your strengths. Rational people typically examine the evidence and come to a rational conclusion. For a rational person to conclude that race was the cause of something, they would either have direct evidence, or exclusionary evidence. In this case, if other AA people were not treated as the wait staff, then it would pretty clearly eliminate her race as a cause.

I know that thinking in a logical and rational manner takes some effort, it may even be tiresome, but you really should try it some time. [/quote]
Oh, you are right because of course the person must have time to to discriminate against every dang POC in the room in order to prove discrimination. 
And a sexist must do something sexist against every woman he meets, etc.
I truly detest deliberate stupidity
[/quote]

Strawman. That's not my position at all. I'll make it simple: the one making the claim has the burden of proof. So it's not up to me to assert that she was not mistaken as the wait staff due to her race, it's up to you to prove that she was. Stating two facts does not mean they have a causal relationship, no matter how much you want them to be. [/quote]

Why does that poster have to prove anything to you? Do you conduct such a thorough examindation of each statement in every single thread you read?  If not, I guess we can make a few assumptions about you as well.  [/quote]

Wow, never thought I'd offend so many by trying to bring a little sanity into this little racial kumbaya of a thread. So if we all went around making baseless assertions without the need to back them up, and we derided those who offered a different opinion or questioned the logic behind the assertion, you really think that's a good recipe for effective communications?[/quote]

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