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Reply to "What American "cultural" things you don't do or allow your kids to do. "
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Refusing these on principle is bizarre. My kids have each done one sleepover in their lives, I believe. They're not dating as teens and young adults. And my second did have a yearlong carpool at some point. But we didn't set off to refuse those things. It just happened that way. Why don't you live your life in a more organic way? You seem extremely mentally rigid. [/quote] TBH - I see no value in them while my kids are young. There are many other things that I do for the socialization of my kids, so I don't think they are missing anything but dangerous situations. I do not want to normalize these things or distract them from their academics, ECs, traveling and having fun with similar kids. In my interactions with American families, I have not walked away with feeling that I want them be around my kids when I am not around. I don't want to do the detective work to find out what the intentions of people around me are especially when it comes to the safety of my children. My kids and I do have these discussions all the time, and I feel I will be more comfortable when they are adults and able to have their own boundaries. [/quote] Wow. Why would you live here if you don't like or trust any "American" families or American cultural traditions?[/quote] My parents were like this and I guess I can explain it to you as an observer. In a lot of countries/cultures, you don’t befriend everyone. You befriend people who are your caste, from your region, your religion, your socioeconomic level, etc. These aren’t laws set in stone, it’s just the way things are. So when people come to America they naturally gravitate to their own “kind.” My parents are not going to socialize with “Americans” just like they are not going to socialize with someone from their own country who is on a different social strata. It’s not personal. They simply decline to navigate social differences if they don’t have to. I don’t know why so many of you are offended by this. People who immigrate go through enough crap, they don’t have to force themselves to befriend you. Their children will assimilate because they grow up in this culture. And this is my personal experience, Americans tend to be very stingy and guarded. They lack the warmth and generosity you experience in my parents’ culture. Look at this forum for myriad examples. It’s a lot less complicated to make friends in other cultures.[/quote] “It’s a lot less complicated to make friends in my home country, and Americans are stingy,” says person from nation with a disgustingly immobile caste system that’s heavily based on colorism [/quote] I am not from a country with a caste system. I was using this as an example. I mean, look at your response. Why would foreigners go out of their way to make friends with you?[/quote] Lol do you know how many posters whine here on a daily basis about how they want to be friends with white people but feel like nobody will talk to them because they are racist? Now you're saying it's the other way around?[/quote] I personally have never had an issue with wanting to befriend white people. I’m just seeing the people on this thread who seem incredibly personally offended when someone from another culture says they are not interested in befriending you or having their children absorb your influence. It is sort of a very white American thing to be so upset about this. White people seem to always want accolades for simply existing. No. Sorry. That’s not how life works.[/quote] Now you're just talking out your ass. Crying about racism is pretty upset. You're going to need a thicker skin to make it here.[/quote]
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