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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Piping up here to say that I’m all for body sovereignty and “getting fit” if that’s what a person chooses but f society for acting like more weight automatically devalues people. I haven’t read every comment but I’ve seen enough and holy hell. Why is everyone so afraid of a few extra pounds? It’s such an obsession that maybe we should ask ourselves why this generates an unreadably long thread instead of assuming that if we aren’t striving to be smaller, we should be so that other people will treat us better and love us more.[/quote]

It may be harsh, but gaining an extra 40% of your body weight devalues a woman (and men) in the sexual marketplace. Does it devalue personality or other internal characteristics? No. But if my wife had been 45 lbs heavier when I first met her, we could have been friends but I would not have been romantically interested. I think this is true for most people. Part of being a good partner is not letting yourself go. A woman who looked good at 135 and now weights 175 has definitely let herself go, and her spouse is totally justified in resenting that.[/quote]

So what?  There are a lot of things that have decreased my value on the sexual marketplace since I met my DH.  I had four children, got my MD, and got 15 years older.  Two of these three were totally within my control.  Is my husband totally justified in resenting me for doing these things?  [/quote]

NP
Aging can't be helped, the MD is irrelevant or positive but never a negative. That 40% though... that's a real negative. Not insurmountable, but we're going to have to put some work in.[/quote]

Kids, advanced degrees, and being older are all negatives for a woman on the dating market.  Sorry to burst your bubble.  [/quote]

What bubble do you live in where an MD is a negative for a woman?

Where are you people from?[/quote]

NP. It definitely depends on the guy. I know a lot of guys view highly educated women or career oriented women as being a pain in the ass. They are so wrapped up in what they are doing at work or talking about dumb museums or college bs from a long time ago that it's just annoying. They usually aren't fun to be around and tend to be high maintenance.

As far as staying fit for your spouse...guys will just bang someone else if you look fat and gross. Take a little pride in your appearance.[/quote]

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