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Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Reply to "Explain to me the financial risk of SAH if partner is a high earner"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Who are you all marrying that they’d do this to you?[/quote] When a man doesnt want to f..k you anymore he will dispose of you and your joint kids with him like trash. Remember it for the rest of your life that 80% of men would do that. Decide accordingly on career[/quote] The reality is that a man can decide he wants someone else based on factors that you have no control over. And he may commit to a new life and do a lot of shifting of assets years before you know anything. [b]Many men do become resentful of a non-working spouse. [/b]As the "trophy" of a SAH wife is shifting to the "trophy" of a successful spouse, the position of SAH moms will continue to become more perilous. If it works, great. But if it stops, you can be a lot worse off than you could have imagined. And CS stops. If you have been completely out of the working world, to get a job that will give you a middle class income in DMV in your late 40s or 50s will be difficult. Age discrimination is real. There used to be some stigma of divorce. My ex's boss and his boss both had multiple marriages. The culture where DH spends most waking hours has more influence over time than the SAH wife does. And workplace affairs in law firms, etc are common. My ex really loved the thrill of the initial sneaking around he told me. Midlife crises are real and you can end up very harmed by them, your kids, too. [/quote] You think a high earning man is really going to respect a 200k career? [/quote] +1 My DH literally said “I pay more than that in taxes” :roll: [/quote] I think they would respect that the person has drive and ambition and accomplishments that have nothing to do with their role as a wife and mother.[/quote] Someone making millions of dollars likely won’t think someone with 200k really has drive, ambition and accomplishments. Sorry but that’s the truth. I’m a working professional and I sure hope my husband values my role as a wife and mother way more than my paper pushing job. [/quote] My FIL is in the boat of making millions, while all of his kids each make under 200k a year. He and my MIL have advanced degrees, while his kids stopped at bachelor's degrees. He's still really proud of their career accomplishments. His kids, irrespective of gender, care more about spending time with family and on hobbies than working long hours and making lots of money. You could argue that men respect their adult kids more than their wives, but that's a different topic altogether.[/quote] All of this. There are just a lot of women on here who don't work are want to push the message that they're still their DH's intellectual peers. No one believes that except them. Sorry, but your DH's do not respect you as their intellectual peers. They respect that you "took one for the team and do shitty work so they don't have to". But those are different things. [/quote] My wife is a SAHM, and I absolutely respect her as my intellectual peer. She certainly does plenty of boring work to keep our lives in order, but it is no more shitty than a lot of the work I do (as a lawyer). I do very much appreciate that she is around for the kids and helps make the home a really nice and loving place for everyone. [/quote]
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