Reply to I was so naive re marriage, career and kids

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP:

This is helpful and I am open to feedback and thinking about this differently.

DH asks me to do stuff all the time. It’s not unusual for us. He asked me to call our condo insurance today because he was in back to back meetings. That took me 45 minutes on the line. I did not mind that he gave me a task.

I do most of the housework when we don’t outsource. We have a cleaner every other week. The other week, I clean the bathroom and DH vaccums. I do all laundry. Almost all scheduled repairs and coordination of those. I order our groceries and supplies. Run other errands. Do the bulk of back up care when needed. Do all doctor appointments. This is because they are more flexible with hours. I do dinner / bedtime two weeknights and one day per weekend.

DH feels entitled to all this because of  2.5 hours he spends doing childcare most days week though not all.

[/quote]

Sounds like you need to find a right balance.

I am a decade ahead of you with 3 kids. We have known all sorts of families - 2 lawyers, 2 doctors, techies, feds, teachers with every variation of childcare.

You need to find what works for your family.

We do know some resentful spouses. Almost always it is the wife who is mad at the husband for not helping enough. This resentment can be from sahms to breadwinner biglaw partners.

You really need to outsource more. [/quote]

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