Reply to Long term affair... trying to wrap my head around if it’s even possible to get over your DH’s 3 yr

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Well honey, here is what I did. My ex DH had a 1.5 year affair. I was very trusting... I had no idea. We were married 14 years, 2 small kids.

I collected evidence of the affair. Screenshots of her double chin and cold sore. Their loving little text messages. Their secret vacations they planned right after Christmas. I blew both their asses up on facebook. Surprise!

I had already consulted a lawyer. I kicked him out. He moved into a shitty apartment. His true love was banging other guys they worked with (surprise! not). So their love story did not endure the harsh realities of real life.

I have been divorced for a year now. The kids have handled it like champs. It's hard. But they have two loving, if separate, parents. I have a good career going. I bought myself a nice house. I save more money than ex ever let me. I save it in a college fund for our kids. I have a nice boyfriend. A normal human, who treats me respectfully. We see eachother enough to enjoy it, but not too much. I like my space. I like my house. I like my life. And I will NEVER get married again.

You will survive this. Its horrifically painful to be betrayed like this. But you will make it. Many virtual hugs to you![/quote]

Thank you for sharing.  Have been wondering what the future would or could look like in actuality.  Everyone says, "GO", you can do it, you'll be happier, the kids will be fine, but it's not clear to me what that life would actually be like.  I can't imagine it.  The pain right now is so terrible that it's impossible to conceive of it being better.  I can conceive of life being less painful but not of life being "better".[/quote]

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